hurrengoa
el columpio asesino goes to jail!!! the balde   When we heard that the band El Columpio Asesino (The Killer Swing) from Irunea were hopping from jail to jail, we decided it was time to get in touch with them. We knew that the parents of pearl earring-wearing young females don�t fancy the idea of having this lot as sons-in law, but in all fairness, we�d never heard of anyone getting thrown in the slammer for it until now. The story, as it always has been, is that killers � including the swingers � always end up behind bars. We asked them to answer a few questions in exchange for a cake with a file-filling. How did this tour of prisons come together?
The Caja Madrid was looking for a loud cheap rock band and they got in touch with our record company, Astro. They only group out of all the bands on the label who were up for it were our good selves. We�ve been told that the man in charge at The Caja Madrid was flaked out at home watching Papillion, and while he was doing his best not to nod off, he seemingly had a vision of a swing.

Do you know how many kilometres you�ve clocked up in your tour van on your jaunt from gaol to gaol?
About a thousand kilometres there and back for each gig, and normally in the same day... really pleasant...

Did you get a chance to talk to the inmates while you were in the prisons?
Yeah, mostly with �trusted� prisoners. They were the ones who gave us a hand unloading and loading the van.

And did they chew the ears off you with the likes of �I�m innocent, I don�t deserve to be here�?
Truth be told, we never heard anything like �My lawyer really put his foot in it� or anything similar. The inmates who spoke to us were pretty open about why they were in prison. You know, the usual stuff like debts, drugs, prostitution, using weapons to threaten people... Having said that, almost everybody seemed to be in jail for drugconnected offences of one type or another. In the women�s wing in Alcala Meco (we played the first gig there) for example, apart from a prisoner who had killed and chopped up her husband, all the others were there because of drugs or prostitution.

You really find all sorts in a prison, don�t you?
An Ecuadorian called Rafa told us he had come over to Spain in search of a new life, but they lifted him at the airport in Barajas. Seven years on and all he has seen is the inside of a prison. Or David from Bilbao. He was in prison in London and he explained just how violent the English Prison System is: an hour a day in the prison yard, no intimate visits� He had two girlfriends on the inside as well, and there were prospects of him getting released as well, he seemed pretty happy.

What about the prison officers? What kind of �character� is a prison warden?
Prison wardens, in general at least, have this habit of always walking two steps behind you. It�s understandable, but it makes you feel uneasy. They are basically the prisoners� shadows and that�s kinda sad. There is a minority of the vocational Christian saviour type, but most guards give you this real nasty glare and snap things like �Don�t even think about lighting up a joint in here� or �If you want a drink of water, there are taps full of it in the toilets� at you.

Are there major differences between the prisons you have been in?
Yes. Every prison is a different universe. At the prison in Alcala Meco you beep and they open up the gates for you whereas at Soto del Real you can barely get in even in the company of prison wardens. We could hardly hold back the tears when we got to Valdemoro because we had just got there from the two concerts we gave in Valencia and Barcelona and we were totally shagged. Before we even started playing in Oca�a the crowd were cheering us on, thanking us for being there... The muslim prisoners at Alcala Meco hadn�t a clue about where we were coming from musically and they totally ignored us. The girls at Alcala Meco were marvellous to us. It was the first gig of the tour and we were terrified, I mean we were almost hiding behind the amps when they were let into the hall, but the reception we received really paved the way for a memorable night. More than one member of the band was invited to dinner and dessert, if you know what I mean.

And did you stay for lunch or dinner in any of the prisoners?
At the start, Busta would have signed the contract we were given. But they must have been informed about us because the wonderful lunch we were supposed to have with the Prison Governor suddenly turned into stale sausage sandwiches.

Did you have any problems with security because of your amps and gear?
It depended on the prison. In general, we didn�t have many problems, apart from Soto del Real. We had to take a cab and Marshall head apart and at the same time try and convince a warden that a sampler we had wasn�t a remote control device for a bomb.

Where are you more nervous? In a prison or at a giant festival like FIB (Benicassim)?
We weren�t nervous in the prisons, we were more perturbed, curious and maybe a little frightened. We�re happy because we met some really grateful and emotional people there. People who willing to get things done. All the same, we should point out that we only got a glimpse of what goes on in there, we saw what we were let see, so our impression is a conditioned one.

What type of reaction was there to your music?
It was foreign to some, others were curious, others didn�t give a flying fuck, some were really caught up in it and the odd one even got emotional about it. When we played �Antisistema�, the crowds really got going. But the music took a back seat in all of this, the live connection that existed and the dialogue between songs were the real stars of the show. The people were roaring out anti-Aznar chants and Long Live Don Pin Pon! (Yep, the very same one from Sesame Street).

Did you play in the prison yards or indoors?
The whole prison yard buzz only happens in American films. The have small halls in all the prisons, and in best ones they had speakers and all. We have to say that some of the prisoners got us abetter sound than in some of those �Super Festivals� you mentioned earlier, especially Fran, the Alcala Meco prisoner-soundman. He was a mate of Mario Conde�s and had worked as a sound technician with Miguel Rios� we suppose that has nothing to do with him being behind bars...

Did they ask you to play anything by Camar�n?
The top five petitions in prison are:
1.Camar�n
2.La Polla Records (the punters knew all their songs by heart)
3.Camela (they must have something�)
4.Le�o
5.And of course, AC DC (to our resignation)

What records or tapes did you leave behind you?
The set up wasn�t what you would call the most appropriate for getting a little �market stall� together. And the �market� that exists in the prisons unfortunately wasn�t open to us.

Did you get the chance to film or photograph any of the concerts?
They wouldn�t let us bring in anything that we didn�t need to play; no cameras, telephones,... but our manager had the neck to chance his arm in Navalcarnero and he took a few photographs. Unfortunately, they caught him and confiscated everything. We had to wait an hour while they did a prisoner headcount... they were really pissed off at that.

What can you add to Lao Tse�s �Don�t enter a place you�re not sure of leaving�?
Life can be really boring.